Transcending

We let so many things push us to our limits. The job, family and friends, negative chance interactions, and other stuff- if we let it- will send us on an emotional roller coaster. We've become addicted to watching television shows and listening to music that is extreme in one way or another, thinking that it doesn't affect us. The truth of the matter is that all of it does. Some things even push us beyond our limits. Depending on the situation, that push can be good for us or bad for us. We have to decide that which it is. This pushing, whether good or bad, is a form on transcension. We all are capable of transcending. We all in fact do it. The problem is that most of us do it unconsciously. We allow things to push us beyond our limits in ways that we don't like. More often than not, it's too late by the time we realize it to do something about it. Choosing your paths for transcension is one of the best things that you can do for yourself in this life. In fact, one of the best gifts that you have been blessed to use as a tool in this life is the ability to transcend. We are all capable of rising above our current circumstances to achieve something better. We can all transcend circumstance. We are all capable of giving and receiving the kind of love that is valuable and useful. We can all transcend a state of unloving. We can all escape the uneasiness we sometimes have in our mind and hearts. There is a way to transcend it. We can all stretch ourselves to be better...start now by stretching your mind and your heart beyond the thought that you can't do it. The second that you think, "I can", then you have! The next step, is to do it in every other area of your life--but do it for good. It won't always be easy, but it will always be worth it in the end.

A reason to love trees

As I look out my window this morning, there's a beautiful site. The leaves from a huge oak tree fall silently to the ground...These leaves, gorgeous in their reddish hues...tired and lifeless cover the grass, giving evidence that the fall season is upon us. The tree itself looks eerily different too. She's slimmed down quite a bit since it started to shed its leaves. There are no squirrels or chipmunks jumping about on her branches. She kind of looks as if she's taken a beating. But she's also still and firm. Where everything else around her is swaying too and fro, she's immovable. She's survived the loss of her leaves, and is now fighting for new life to be birthed from her branches. I've always felt like a tree. I've lost some, most, and even all of the leaves from my branches in past winters. But I've always recovered and new life has always sprang from my branches when the clouds lifted. There is one difference now than what was present before. That difference is now that I realize it happening, I can watch it materialize and be in awe of the power that makes it so.

Something new...

If you asked most people in the world if they liked to get new things, they would say, "Of course!" If you asked them, if they would like to try something new, then the percentage of yay-sayers would decrease to about half. If you asked them if they would like to work at something new, then the percentage of those who would say yes, lessens even more. Often, I've wondered why some people jump at the chance to try something new, and why others inherently hate the idea and cringe at the thought of it. After doing a little research, I found out what instinctively, I think I already knew: 1. Some people don't want to fail at something or look silly. 2. Some people can't always accurately calculate the risk in something. 3. Some people are comfortable with routine, they prefer what's normal. 4. Some people lack the knowledge and motivation to change, even if they want to. Many other things also come into play, such as cultural beliefs, influences from those we respect and admire, and most importantly our own perception of our abilities. We can overcome all of the challenges to change that were just mentioned. There is one simple answer to all of the aforementioned issues. The answer is to make a decision! Decide, that you're going to overcome your challenges, and then do it! In the world around us, there are scores of people out there who just took this advice. Doing so will force personal growth, will beat down fear, and will make the smell of success just that much sweeter! Become a yay-sayer today! Say yes to something positive and something new!

Show her that you love her

When a woman has been in an intimate relationship for some time, she wants to be sure that it's going somewhere special. No matter her age, a woman wants to be reassured that she is spending her time, giving the best of herself to someone who deserves it. She is always looking for reassurance that the man she's with loves her unconditionally. She wants to know that he will be there to support her. Help her when she needs it. Console her when she is hurting and to spend time with her strengthening their relationship. So how do women make themselves sure that a man loves her? She will judge him by his words and his actions. For all you men out there who want to know how a woman deems you to be a good enough specimen to share the best of themselves with, here's what you should be paying attention to with regards to your words and actions, because you can bet your bottom dollar that your special woman has tuned into these same things about you: 1. Be a man of your word. Do exactly what you say you will do. 2. Be open and honest about your feelings always! 3. Never say you love a woman, unless you intend to show it! 4. Be encouraging for her. 5. Put her first when she really needs you. 6. Be on time. 7. Don't overstate your knowledge or ability in any area. 8. Admit your mistakes. 9. Apologize properly when you make a mistake. 10.Be HONEST- At all times! 11. Don't just hear, LISTEN! 12. Be willing to compromise. These things don't require any money. They just require a little thoughtfulness. If you're a man who does not possess these qualities, then you have work to do! Work on putting some of these things into your half of the relationship. Because if you don't, you could lose a love that you didn't even know you were taking for granted, until it is too late!

Is this a sign from God?

Today, Sherry and a good friend was involved in an argument. The two people have a long history and recently their relationship has been very volatile. The person that Sherry was arguing with was making physical threats towards her and she felt that it was her duty to get to where this person was to start a physical altercation. Another friend of Sherry's tried very hard to get her to let go of the anger she had as a result of the argument. This friend, who also knew the person that Sherry was arguing with, reminded her of all of the things that this threatening person was capable of. Also, normally, Sherry is very resourceful. She never has any problems getting what she needs. Today, she felt that she needed to start this altercation. It didn't happen though because she couldn't get where she needed to go in order to make it possible. After listening for several minutes of Sherry's rants about not being able to make it, the friend who was with her asked her, "Do you think that your not being able to get to the fight destination, is a sign from God?" This question, stopped Sherry dead in her tracks! After thinking about it for some time, she calmed down and said, "Maybe it is." Sometimes God gives us signs that something is NOT good for us. Sherry would have been putting herself in a possible world of danger, if she had made it to her fight destination. She was concerned about people thinking that she was a door mat, if she didn't stand up for herself. She said that she was tired of being friends with the person that she was arguing with. If we let our emotions control us, then we would probably find Sherry's reasons to be the aggressor in a fight to be great ones for doing so. However, sometimes the best course of action to end a relationship we don't want anymore is to be silent. We should just end communication with a person and move on. Sometimes God will help us out, by keeping us from accomplishing something that will hurt us in the long run. Do you believe this is what happened with Sherry? It sure does make sense!

It's not as bad as it can be

Recently, I have experienced some feelings that made me feel really bad.  I have felt lonely and displaced.  I have experienced feelings of worthlessness and and sadness.  I am sure that I am not the only one out there who experiences these feelings from time to time.  I have always struggled with finding my place in society, with my family, and in the workplace at different points in my life. After days of feeling down and out, I remembered that I can always find the peace that I need in God's word.

After I remembered that, I went to God in prayer and asked him, "Lord God, what is your will for my life?" He told me that his will is for me to help others.  Ironically, I have always felt that this is what I should be doing.  In my own ways, throughout my life, I have tried to do that.  So much that it was to a fault.  I also realized that some people just wanted to use me and my talents for ill will.  They saw something in me that they could take advantage of.  After thinking of these things, stupidly, I asked God again, if helping others was my true calling.  And again, he answered, "YES!"  So now, I was faced with the questions of who do I help and how?  Here's what I came up with:

• Help those who have a strong desire and the WILL to help themselves.
• Help those who are ignorant to the glory of God to see it.
• Help those who are less fortunate with a meal, clothes, or just a smile (which ever is applicable for the situation)
• But most importantly, help those who really need it, to see the light of God by showing it!  Be thankful out loud, be humble at all times, give God the glorious credit he deserves for all of the great things that he does for you--and share with others how he has and continues to help you.

So today, and for the rest of my life, I will try to complete the "helping tasks" that my Lord and Savior has placed upon my heart to do.  I will however be mindful to look out for those people and situations that do not wish to receive the help that I am to provide and use it for God's purpose.  I have found that no matter how hard things seem to be for me, there is always someone else who suffers worse.  My drama therefore is never as bad as it can be.

Growing Up Can Be Hard to Do

Growing up can be a very hard thing to get through.  There are so many things to be excited about, like becoming old enough to vote, being able to stay out as late as you want, and having that belief that you can do anything that you want.  It's also very frightening.  There's all that responsibility to look forward to.  Deciding upon a career and paying for food and shelter on your own.  There's the idea of marriage and raising your own family to think about. 

When I think back on that tender time in my life when I was between the ages of 16-18, I was so excited about what I would offer the world.  I never really considered in all my "knowledge" what it would throw back at me.  There were so many things that I had to take a "crash course" in because I had no clue about them.  During those times of my young life, I thought the world was against me...and I was right!  I wasn't as prepared as I should have been, but I learned how to do it...because I wanted to.  

That is really the trick to striking down what the world is throwing at you.  Preparation a great bat to use when hitting the world's balls.  It can help us avoid a lot, because it can teach healthy anticipation.  It's also important to be prepared to work.  Gratitude and work bring abundance.  If you're doing great work, then abundance can be infinite.  Love everyone, regardless of who or what they are.  This does not mean that you should run around giving the shirt off of your back to everyone who asks for it....but it does mean respecting others and appreciating any positive connection you have with another person, regardless of how long it lasts...Pay attention with love in your hear to your fellow man.  Finally, give of yourself to those who give of themselves to you.  These things can make that transition to adulthood much smoother.  They can also pave the way to your having the life you always wanted!

Learning to Trust

One of the problems that I see in contemporary American society is that people in general seem to be losing the ability to trust one another.  In general, we distrust our legislative body (who has recently been giving us many reasons to do so).  We don't trust that strangers will help us and won't hurt us.  But most importantly, we are slowly losing the trust that we should have for our loved ones.

When we don't trust people, it can lead to many difficulties in a relationship.  Pointless arguments occur on a regular basis.  We tend to want to tag along with the loved one when they want to go somewhere without us, but most of all, we can let the level of distrust we feel take us out of our character.  This is not good, because who are you, if you don't have your character?

Also, it doesn't matter the kind of relationship.  It can be a platonic one or an intimate one, the result will still be the same.  If the breakdown of trust continues, then the relationship is on an inevitable path to destruction.  Someone will be hurt, if there is no trust. This hurt can be mental, emotional, or even physical.  What can we do if we find ourselves in a place where we don't trust someone that we love?  There are several Biblical verses that speak to this very thing.  One of them is Romans 12:19, which says, "Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, Vengeance is mine, and I will repay", saith the Lord. This verse provides specific instruction from God on how to deal with the mistrust that you feel for others.  The Bible also says in 1 Corinthians 4:5, "Therefore, judge nothing before the appointed time.  Wait until the Lord comes.  For what is done in the dark, he will bring to the light."  This is also explicit instruction from the Lord.  He tells us not to be judgmental and to wait on him to show us the truth.  As with all of God's words, they will come to fruition.  It's natural law and it never fails.

So the next time you find yourself, losing your character because you don't trust someone, remember just these two verses, and revel in the fact that the Lord our God will show you what you need to see.  Find the happiness and strength you need in the fact that he is going to set all things right for you. and expose any wrong doing that has taken a course against you.

Focus is a skill!

I used to think that subliminal messages were mostly bad.  I would watch television or read certain types of literature and find them all the time.  All I could see were "warning" and "statistical" messages that all seemed to be designed to control who we can become.  However, when I started to look for good messages, I found that they were just as abundant, if not more plentiful.

I had to focus on finding good messages though, in order to do it.  Before long it became super easy to do, so I focused on doing other things.  That work has led me to the point where I am able to write this message,  for you and for myself; on a sunny Monday morning, living a life that I love.  Earlier this morning, I thought about what it took to get me to this point.  I realized that my focus has gotten much better in the last few years that I have been on my life journey.  There are different levels of focus.  If you are conscious of your level of focus often, then you can feel the difference between being at the level when you can find a needle in a haystack, and the level that it takes to drink a glass of water.

Because we can practice using the levels of intensity of focus, it is indeed a learned skill.  The problem with many of us is that we won't consciously practice it.  Intensity of focus is what builds great cities and produces  great artists.  It's what pushes us forward into the future.  What we focus on is the determinant for if and how we will arrive in the future.  And if you focus hard enough, you can see that the future is always now. It would also be good to remember that all focus on something produces something, now or later.  If you skillfully use your focus to project evil, then surely you will see it.  If you use skilled focus to produce good, it will show itself as well.  So in this moment, now...start to practice on your skill of focus.  See what effects practicing it and using it skillfully can have on your life.

Get up! Do something!

I have been wondering for the last couple week or so, what new could be said about the month of February and all of the important dates that take place in February.  Let's outline them:  We celebrate the birthdays of two famous American presidents.  One was a leader in the war that gave America it's independence.  The other was instrumental in putting an end to slavery.  We also celebrate love in the month of February with Valentine's day.

For most African Americans, the month is important because it's a time to celebrate their history and how they overcame obstacles that kept them oppressed.  The more I considered these things, the more I realized that they are all tied together....connected, as we should be.  For one, we should love each other enough to respect and help our fellow man, regardless of creed, sex, or religion.  The history of this country and the history of African American people reflect the same things. 

The first people who migrated on their own to this country, did so to free themselves of an oppressive monarch.  While, all African Americans did not come to this country of their own volition, they worked hard over decades to free themselves of oppressive slave owners.  They worked hard to ensure that the government recognized them as human beings, with equal and unalienable rights. 

These people made history because they got up and did something about their circumstances.  They lived, fought, and died for what they believed was right and just.  They took pride in their cultures, heritages, and worked to pass certain values on to their posterity.  But now, more and more, I see this strength, this desire, being trampled by laziness, detachment, amoral behavior, and a ever growing lack of love and respect for our fellow man, regardless of creed, sex, or religion.  

As we remember these people, and the struggles they endured to make us free and give us opportunity...a chance at a real life lived, we should remember that we too must GET UP and DO SOMETHING!  We must do something to restore that power we once had in ourselves as a people, as a part of the human race. This month, we should really focus on the needs of our brother man...we need to make sure that he is safe...and that our future is as well.  The only way we will succeed in doing that is...together.  

Riding in a Whirlwinds!

Have you ever experienced a whirlwind?  That great gush of wind comes along and carries you off balance for just a bit?  As it meets you, it brings along leaves that found their place on the ground underneath their home trees, and maybe a small scrap of paper that someone lost along their way. 

On a hot summer day, the whirlwind's breeze is a welcome treat!  It cools you off and brings a smile to your face, as you enjoy the sudden coolness, as it squeezes your face, which was crackling from the heat.  The people who were inside, miss nature's attempt to bring them the simple joy of a summer's day wind.  Those who don't have modernized cooling mechanisms to keep them airy, must settle more rudimentary methods to bring their skin the breeze it needs to settle down.

Imagine the breezes of life as being the same as nature's world wind.  Swift and cool...Blowing through with the opportunity of a life time. Blessings that have been hidden sometimes- wrapped in the debris that the gush has accumulated on its travels.  When it passes by you, the whirlwind swoops you up too.  And a magnetic object passes by you.  You grab hold to it and land where it lands.  As you remove the dust from the object, you realize that the ball like object is your potential.  It has a place for a lock, but the area is broken and the lock is missing.  Once you open it, you realized that it has inside a seed of opportunity- that is waiting for you to nourish it until its reality.

I found my seed of opportunity this same way, you know.  I nourished it, and loved it.  Labored for it, with no complaint.  That seed has grown into God's greatest gift for me.  Its brought more to me than I ever would have had, if I had not looked for it in the whirlwind that picked me up!