Make your own opportunity

"I had to make my own living and my own opportunity.  Don't sit down and wait for the opportunities to come- Get up and make them!" This an such an inspirational truth and a blunt call to action delivered by one of the most influential women in American History, Madame CJ Walker.  Madame CJ Walker is most notably credited with the invention of a chemical hair relaxer or the pressing comb (incorrectly, I might add), and so much so that all of the other things that she did to lift up and inspire, not only her race and women, but people as a whole is often overshadowed.

Mrs. Walker, a descendent of slaves- got instructions in a dream to correct a condition from which she was suffering, which caused hair loss.  Once she followed the instructions and reversed her condition, she set about the business of sharing her "tonic" with people everywhere.  While she was not herself a slave, she did work in the cotton fields of the Mississippi Delta, eventually working her way up to the kitchen.  After developing her scalp tonic, she began traveling from city to city promoting her hair products which eventually led to her having the ability to open several hair salons,beauty schools, and even a manufacturing plant.  She even developed and trained sales people to promote her products!  In addition to building a wonderful business, she was very charitable!  Giving thousands of dollars (yes, THOUSANDS) organizations such as the NAACP, and even joined a group of Harlem leaders to the Whitehouse to demand that the federal government develop and enact anti-lynching laws.  The attitude that Madame CJ Walker had was one of strength, dedication to something that she loved, and a commitment to hard work.  She had a dream and worked tirelessly to make it a reality.  She was able to become an entrepreneur and a respected member of her community, in the most unfavorable and unequal conditions. 

Today, the possibilities are endless for those who have a passion to make their own way- to acquire wealth, to be educated, to reach for a place higher in society than they currently stand.  When times were as difficult as they were in Walker's time, people still perservered and pushed through to become successful, influential people- who made history!  The lesson that we need to get from them and keep at the forefront of our minds, is shaped in the very quote that began this blog post.  Make your opportunity- create your living.  Work hard at making your dreams come true, as they surely can even in the most dire of consequences.

The TRUTH about the life of Madame CJ Walker can be found on a website dedicated to her and maintained by her great-great grandaughter, A'Lelia Bundles: http://www.madamcjwalker.com/

Don't just spread the message of hope, be a modal for it

I am always elated to receive email messages of hope!  But these messages founded on varying religious sacraments are meant to do more than just spread a message of hope.  They are also meant by the original creators (in many, but maybe not all cases) to inspire other believers to become beacons of hope for others.  These messages should serve as a call to action for the utilitarian good of others, but sadly, more often than not, people miss the mark- and their opportunity to decide to become the astonishing exemplars that God intended us to be.

I get these messages and I am so glad to receive them, as I stated before, and so many of them have moved me to action!  So much so that my calendar is practically filled on a daily basis with things that I can do to help and inspire others. Volunteer work, helping a neighbor, supporting another person's efforts to improve a condition, are all things that I have found to be a personal mission for me.  I receive such a great feeling whenever I can help someone else to become inspired....to see and believe in that hope, which these messages are meant to deliver.  I feel such a connection with the Godsource- our Lord and Savior. 

In addition, (while it's really none of my business), I can't help but wonder- if the people who forward these beautiful messages, try to be excellent paradigms themselves?  And if they are not trying, what is holding them back?  Have you asked yourself recently which one you are?  Are you the uninvolved, lackadaisical messenger or are you the person that has become an exquisite model for sharing hope?

While our Father God in Heaven, likes a great messenger, he also adores a great doer.  An example can be found in the book of James of the Bible, where it says:

"And one of you say to the them, depart in peace, be warmed and filled, but not give them not those things which are needful to the body, what does it profit?  Even so faith, if it hath not works is dead, being alone. Yea, a man may say, Thou hast faith, and I have works: shew me thy faith without thy works, and I will shew thee my faith by my works..." (James 2:16-18, KJV).

These verses from the good book go right to the heart of what is expected of humans on this earth as it relates to our works and charity.  Our actions are what really show our commitment, they are what help us to show the light of God in us.  While email , chain-texts, and all other forms of messages for goodwill, may warm our skin and lighten our hearts, if they don't move us to action, they are pointless.  And while being a messenger is a good thing, they are typically forgotten once the intended person has received the message.  But the unique person who gets such a message and moves mountains by his faith and works is the one who will go down in history!

On the outside looking in

Have you ever stopped to take a break or relax in a park and noticed a group talking? Or maybe you've watched people interact with one another while sitting on the patio at a restaurant or from some other place, not a short distance away?  Today, I did the first thing.  I was in a park, and began to notice the other people  there.  They were engaged in varying activities, but my focus seemed to fall on the basketball court.  I was far enough away from the court that I couldn't hear a word that transpired there.  But I was close enough to see every person on the court. Let me describe the scene for you:

There were trees all around, deciduous trees, and one pine tree.  They followed along side the one paved road that led to a clearing which housed a typical concrete basketball court.  There were 4 hoops with no nets, 3 balls, about 16 people, and one guy wearing a read shirt.  He was very comfortable with the ball, making almost every shot from behind his free throw line.  Immediately behind him were 5 smaller guys, middle school age perhaps, who were struggling a little bit.  One of them, the one wearing the yellow jersey with the number 5 and black striped shorts ran from the basketball court after their wildly bouncing ball, down a hill to the southeast.  At the southwest end of the court, a woman, dressed in a magnolia flower printed, strapless dress, kisses her beau in the most loving way, as the 3rd basketball bounces across the middle of the court with 7 or 8 small children chasing it.  As the boy wearing the number 5 jersey returns to the court with his ball, he is immediately cornered by the other guys in his group, who are full of laughter and excitement....ready to take the ball.

This is an example of someone on the outside looking in.  Even though, I was not a part of either group at the park, I remember vividly most of what I saw happen there.  I was on the outside, but I could have chosen to walk down to the court from where I was sitting and be a part of the action.  It would have been very easy to do.

You should treat your vision the same way.  Look at it as a real opportunity, a scenario that is really going on...one that you can walk toward.  Then do just that.  Invite yourself into it.  Keep the vision that you've painted always at the front of your mind, and while you're thinking of it, take the keys the universe gives you to make your way to it.  Eventually, you will arrive at the scene.  You don't have to be on the outside, just walk towards whatever is going on, and join the action!

Don't be afraid of the unknown...Embrace it!



Today, I encountered a familiar situation with my daughter.  She is an eclectic person, very unique and mature for her age.  She loves music and art, and it shows in her personality and her appearance.  While sometimes I am a little taken back by her style, I always feel compelled to let her be herself.  She makes great decisions and has a lot of common sense and book sense. 

Today, she called me from school in tears because some senior students decided to make her the butt of some very derogatory jokes on Instagram.  For those of you who are not familiar, Instagram is a social networking site of sorts, and is fast becoming popular with young people, just as My Space did a few years ago.  She was so badly affected by the things that the students posted about her, that she made the decision to let go of who she really is, in order to be left alone by these students.

Well, being a concerned parent, who is very proud of her daughter's individuality, I immediately stopped what I was doing and made my way to her school.  There I found her in the school's office, sitting, crying, and contemplating changing who she was to suit the needs of someone else.  When she told me what she was going to do, I put these thoughts on her mind.  "If you change who you are for them now, you will find yourself doing that when you get older.  It may make them happy (though I am pretty sure it wouldn't), but what will it make you?"  These kids, like many adults are afraid of the unknown.  They don't know how to embrace the idea of BEING individuals, so they pick on those who have the courage to do so!  Think of how you could let yourself down by giving into the whims of bullys--don't let them box you into what they want you to be.  They are not worth your shrinking, but you owe it to yourself and the world to shine!"

Of course after a lengthy discussion with those in charge of the offending students, I expressed my intention to seek criminal charges and monetary recompense for the harassment, if they continued this depraved behavior.  I let them know that I would not tolerate it, and would go to any length to protect my daughter..as in the famous words of Malcolm X...by any means necessary.  Normally, I am not this type of person.  But today, I was taken to a place where what needed to be said, had to be said...right then, at that moment.

So the message today is, to not be afraid of the unknown...it's so much better to embrace it.  If those kids had taken half the time to introduce themselves to my daughter and asked her to share something about herself, then they could have made an informed decision about whether or not, they were going to be friends with her.  The same is true with many adults.  We spend so much time judging a book by it's cover, we never take the time to unlock the power inside it!  Just because something is different, it doesn't mean that it is bad.  Don't knock the unknown, because while it can be dark, more often than not, you will find a one of kind treasure in something or someone.  It's also important that we take care of our children.  They are our future, and I definitely want mine to be bright!   Cyberbullying is a growing trend that could be potentially dangerous and heartbreaking for the victim.  For more information about cyberbullying, go to stopcyberbullying.org

The world needs more billets-doux

A good friend of mine (she's actually more like a sister to me), sent me an exciting message the other day.  She was elated to find out the meaning of billet-doux (pronounced "bil-lay doo).  She asked me, "Why do you think that people don't participate in passing along billets-doux anymore?"  While she stomped me with that question, she did raise a very valid point afterward.  She stated, couldn't the Bible be considered a billet-doux?  After careful thought, I concluded that sure it could!

For those of you who don't know what the term billet-doux means, it is the way to say love letter in the French language.  The French started using the term sometime betweeen 1666 and 1675.  These "notes" were passed between lovers and good friends, as a letter of love could and should be shared with everyone that you feel the emotion for, whether it is romantic or plutonic.  While, the practice has lost its luster over the centuries, and especially in contemporary times (probably due to the invention of the telephone and the advancement of technology as it relates to computers- email in other words), putting it into practice again could begin the process of shifting those who lack the ability for whatever reason back to openly sharing love for one another, more often.  A billet-doux can be kept by the receiver as a reminder of another's affection, opening their minds and hearts to better understanding when their love one makes a mistake and could be used for reconciliation and repair of a previously damaged relationship. 

In addition, they could also be used to deepen the ripples of love that could be permeating in the hearts of a person that you admire, and since it is not practiced as often, could make you appear unique in a good way to the object of your affection.  Even a simple billet-doux with just a few well thought lines could carry you a long way in capturing the object of your heart's desire--and keeping them going could help you to build an unbreakable bond with each other. 

Back to the idea that the living word from the Holy Bible could be considered a billet-doux.  It could in fact be called this, as the good book is God's immaculate attempt to show us how much he loves us and wants a relationship with us.  He expresses his deep desire for us to be with him, by sharing the story of how he gave his only begotten son's human life, so that we could have the life that is required to be in his presence--to experience his love first hand.  Of course with any relationship, work is involved.  But in a standard love-based relationship between two humans, you are not given any specific instructions on how to strengthen that love.  God loves us so much however, that he has provided explicit instructions on how to develop the best kind of love affair imaginable--and that is one with him.  Further, we received a directive from the book of life to love each other as God loves us.  Why not fashion our methods after those of our mighty father.  Write a billet-doux or a letter of love to a special person in your life.  It doesn't have to be a boyfriend or a girlfriend.  It can be your mother, your children, or your next door neighbor.  Take the time to tell them why you love them and appreciate them.  Remind them of the great qualities you see in them, and your belief that they can reach any dream and overcome any obstacle.  Doing that will definitely make their day, and it will strengthen their love for you!

Tips for developing a successful mindset

People ask me all the time what I do to keep myself motivated.  They often say to me, " You do so much! How do you keep it all together? Aren't you afraid you won't stay motivated?  What happens if you fail?"  I say to them, "There's no way I can fail, if I keep going!"  After I say that, people tend to look at me as if I'm crazy!  They then proceed to tell me things like, "People are different, you are the type of person that has always gone after certain things, I am not like that." Or I hear, "Yeah, but you're more educated, or more outgoing, etc."

These people, as I once used to, have a defeating mindset.  I don't have that mindset anymore.  I trained myself to get past the negative things that we inherently tell ourselves.  For most people, when we have a big idea, we often talk ourselves out of going through with making them a reality because we allow the negative thoughts that will crowd our minds to take over.  I was one of those people, until someone unexpected told me that I could train myself to get past the negativity.  They pointed me in the direction of literature that explained how to do this.  This person gave me a list of old and contemporary literature pieces that I could read, and reminded me that the Bible says that, "As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he", Prov. 23:7.  And while we shouldn't need any other confirmation, than the words written in the Bible, there have been countless other literary works that have proven the point to be so.

Here are some tips that you can utilize to change your mindset, and in essence change your life!

• Tell yourself in the mirror, that you are deserving of great things.  Remind yourself often throughout the day that you are going to achieve great things....It takes on average 21-30 days for a person to form a habit.  If you get into the habit of telling yourself that you deserve greatness, then you will be sure to accomplish it!
• Focus your attention on the thing that you want to accomplish and take action!  Keep going until you get there!  There is a natural law that never fails, which says what you think about, you bring about...whether its positive or negative!
• Tune out those people who say you can't do it!
• Keep your head by following a specific plan that is going to get you what you want!  Action, is KEY to making your dreams come true!
• Expose yourself to things (literature, things on t.v., the radio, or the Internet) that are positive.  What you expose yourself to the most, is what your mind will determine is important for you to remember.  If it's all good, then so are you!

By doing these things, you will change your thinking.  You will turn the negative switch off in your mind, and activate the positive switch.  If you believe in what God says in the Bible, then you must know in your heart that you can't fail!  Finally, track your progress.  You need to see yourself reaching the goal- it motivates you to keep going!  Go right now to a mirror, and practice it!  If you are in need of money, say "I have more money than I know what to do with" to yourself, instead of saying, "I wish I had more money!"  Because if you keep telling yourself you wish you had more money, you will be doing just that...wishing!

If you are ready to make a financial change or any other change for that matter, it all has to be set in motion in your mind first!  

Cutting out the middle man



Money is all around you!  Just reach UP and grab it!

 When people think about entrepreneurs are only successful if they live in a huge mansion and drive a big car. They get their idea of a successful business person from television typically, where they see the finished product. Their favorite personality already has a huge home, can take fabulous vacations, and live as if they are a regular on Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous!  They don't consider what the person was or how they lived before they became immensely successful.  Being an entrepreneur myself, I've heard this advice a million times, "You should go and get a job!"

What people don't realize, but should think about,  is what the true meaning of success is!  I am positive that you've heard someone say somewhere that they were successful because they had a job that paid good money, or they live in a nice home and drive a nice car.  Their home could be in a modest suburban neighborhood, and they may drive a Lexus (which is really just a luxury Toyota), and be able to shop regularly at the local mall.  Yet, they are seen as successful simply because they earn their living by going to a job where someone else pays them.

An entrepreneur who lives in the same modest neighborhood and drives an Infinity (the luxury Nissan), should also be counted as successful.  In fact, he should be counted more successful, because he has done something that the corporate person has not done...he's cut out the middle man!  There is no difference in how the entrepreneur and the corporate person get their money.  The corporate person reports to work, does his job, and gets paid by an employer....who was paid by someone else for the employee's work!  An entrepreneur also goes to work, does his job, but gets paid by his client directly.  

An entrepreneur doesn't have to share the fruits of his labor with a boss.  He is free to take it all for himself!  And as he continues to grow his business, he can create a corporate job for someone who's not confident enough not to hire a middleman to tell him what to do!  I mean most of us look for a company to hire us, and when they finally do, we've hired them too!  We've hired them to tell us when to come into work, and when to leave.  We've hired them to tell us how much they are going to pay us, and when we can take vacation.  We've hired them dictate a significant portion of our lives. When you look at it from this perspective, doesn't it make you want to cut out your middle man?

Make plans to be successful

Today, I was thinking about all the things that I have accomplished in my time on this planet.  I always hear people say, "I want to do this or that, but I don't know where to begin".  So my purpose today is to hopefully help you begin doing the "this or that" that you've always imagined yourself doing.  One of the things that set the "haves" apart from the "have nots", is their ability to plan their destiny effectively.  They follow specific steps in an effort to guarantee their success.  Even God made plans in the Bible, and began doing so in Genesis, right after he separated the heavens and the earth.  Here's the plan for man:
"Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; and let them rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over the cattle and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth,” (Gen.1:26).

This verse and some others from the Bible have all of the elements of making an effective plan.  Here are the steps for you to remember and to follow:

• Step One: Identify your long term and short term goals.  In the verse above, God stated the short term goal, which was to complete the making of man in his likeness.  The long term goal, to let them rule over all the other "animal" beings on earth.
• Step Two: Figure out what you need and what it would take to set the plan in action: God figured that man needed to be created in his image in order to be able to effectively rule the animals. God visualized what he wanted man to be like and he got to work on making that vision a reality.
• Step Three: Determine what is standing in your way.  Of course, the Lord God, didn't have any barriers standing in his way.  But there is instruction given to us by Jesus which states, "For which one of you when he wants to build a tower, does not first sit down and calculate the cost, to see if he has enough to complete it", (Luke 14:28-32)? 
• Step Four: Take Action! There is a very familiar saying amongst those who are super successful.  They believe that you should plan your work, THEN work your plan!  Don't just talk about it, BE about it!  Act as if you are living your dream now as you are working for it.  Eventually, what you are dreaming of and working toward will come to pass.  The promise is there for you to read yourself in the living word.  It says, "In all labor there is profit, but mere talk only leads to poverty" (Prov. 14:23). 
• Step Five: Determine the success of the plan.  Everyone needs a way to determine if their plan is working.  You can analyze your plan from a financial standpoint for example.  Or you can use different tools, depending on what your plan and its purpose is to determine if it is successful.  You can create milestones- to look at the work that you have completed thus far and list the pros and cons of the things that you have implemented, or even a software program that plots the different tasks you have by level of importance, due date, etc.  If something in the plan isn't working, you don't have to throw it away altogether...sometimes all that is needed is a little tweaking!
• Step Six: If it keeps you from working on your plan, avoid it!  There are times when things will come up which will grab your attention, even if they have nothing to do with your goal!  It can be as simple as a friend calling with a juicy story, or your favorite t.v. show is on in a minute.  These are times when you will be faced with a decision.  Do you put off work that you need to be doing now to be a chatty Kathy with your friend or to tune into that t.v. show now, even though you will see it on youtube later?  The decision is always yours, but so are the consequences!
• Step Seven: Keep going until you make it!  The Bible also warns us about giving up too soon!   Galatians 6:9 says, "And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up."  So in essence you are obeying the living word when you keep going!  And if you are faithful, the promise is that you will reap from the seeds you sewed!

So now that the TRUE secret to being successful is out, what are you going to do to reach yours?  Are you just going to keep sitting there, or are you going to make plans to have something great happen?