Are you spending your time meaningfully?

I hear people all the time speak about how they wished they could live our their dreams.  They want to be wealthy, they want to have nice homes, cars, and a great nesteg.  They want to be debt-free and put their children through college.  They want to retire young and die happy.  I also see people pass up opportunities all the time that could put them on the path to those things they truly seek.  I heard a wonderful acronym for poor once...I will share it now:

P-Passing

O-Over

O-Opportunities

R-Repeatedly

The really ironic thing is that people pass the opportunities over, in large part, because they feel they don't have the time to pursue them.  They say, "Oh, I will work on my dream, once my husband or wife achieve theirs." or "I will do it when the kids can take better care of themselves."  Or "I am working too much right now, I can't take the time to go after my dreams, I have bills to pay."  Now, while it is a good thing to support the spouse's dream, or wishing the children were older, and it's okay to work those extra hours on the job (for some people at least).  That does not mean that you can't work on your dream too.  Even if it's for a few minutes to an hour each day. Really, for all the things that we can accomplish in this life, a lot of what we afford to do depends on how well we manage our time.

Take my life for example.  I worked a full-time job, ran a small business part-time, went to school full-time to earn a master's degree (which I accomplished), wrote and published a book, all while being a single mother.  What did that look like for me?  Well, I didn't get a chance to watch as much reality television.  I didn't have as much time to spend with negative people (which does affect you- whether you believe it or not), and I didn't have time to take on tasks for other people, so that THEY could have the laissez-faire lifestyle they were dreaming of.  I had two steady streams of income (which have now become 5), I learned a lot- and I taught my child a very valuable lesson, which is no matter what your circumstances are, you can do better!  Of all of my accomplishments, the last one is the one which I most savor.

The good news in all of this is, that YOU can accomplish the same things and more!  You simply need to start by assessing how you use your time.  Once you determine where the time is going, you can decide what things you need to delegate- what things are just wasting time, and where you can add more time to your day.  For instance, if you turn off your television for 15 minutes a day extra- five days a week, you add 1 hour and 5 minutes to your week- an hour that you can spend working a business, taking a class, or just reading for information. Just imagine if you illiminated 1 hour a day, five days a week from watching television, or doing some other leisurely activity that you participate in all the time.  That's 5 hours that you can use doing something else.

There are plenty of books which have been written on the subject.  Stephen Covey, has produced a lot of great information that can make you more effective in managing your time and resources- but this kind of information has been made available across the span of our age.  A quick way to assess where your time is going is to take a week- to jot down all of the things you do in a day, and evaluate how long those things take you.  Make an update on a schedule or appointment page at least once every hour.  At the end of the week, go back and look it over- then ask yourself, "How much of this, did I really need to be doing?  What benefit did I get from it, and could I have spent the time doing something more meaninful?"  Finally, ask yourself, "What things could have been delegated and what things could have waited?  I am sure that you will be surprised at where your time goes, and seeing it written out will more than likely spark a fire in you to change some things.  Remember, if you want something different, you will have to do something different often times to get it...why not start by making a difference by managing your time better?  It's a sure fire way to help you gain the success you seek!

Don't be afraid of the unknown...Embrace it!



Today, I encountered a familiar situation with my daughter.  She is an eclectic person, very unique and mature for her age.  She loves music and art, and it shows in her personality and her appearance.  While sometimes I am a little taken back by her style, I always feel compelled to let her be herself.  She makes great decisions and has a lot of common sense and book sense. 

Today, she called me from school in tears because some senior students decided to make her the butt of some very derogatory jokes on Instagram.  For those of you who are not familiar, Instagram is a social networking site of sorts, and is fast becoming popular with young people, just as My Space did a few years ago.  She was so badly affected by the things that the students posted about her, that she made the decision to let go of who she really is, in order to be left alone by these students.

Well, being a concerned parent, who is very proud of her daughter's individuality, I immediately stopped what I was doing and made my way to her school.  There I found her in the school's office, sitting, crying, and contemplating changing who she was to suit the needs of someone else.  When she told me what she was going to do, I put these thoughts on her mind.  "If you change who you are for them now, you will find yourself doing that when you get older.  It may make them happy (though I am pretty sure it wouldn't), but what will it make you?"  These kids, like many adults are afraid of the unknown.  They don't know how to embrace the idea of BEING individuals, so they pick on those who have the courage to do so!  Think of how you could let yourself down by giving into the whims of bullys--don't let them box you into what they want you to be.  They are not worth your shrinking, but you owe it to yourself and the world to shine!"

Of course after a lengthy discussion with those in charge of the offending students, I expressed my intention to seek criminal charges and monetary recompense for the harassment, if they continued this depraved behavior.  I let them know that I would not tolerate it, and would go to any length to protect my daughter..as in the famous words of Malcolm X...by any means necessary.  Normally, I am not this type of person.  But today, I was taken to a place where what needed to be said, had to be said...right then, at that moment.

So the message today is, to not be afraid of the unknown...it's so much better to embrace it.  If those kids had taken half the time to introduce themselves to my daughter and asked her to share something about herself, then they could have made an informed decision about whether or not, they were going to be friends with her.  The same is true with many adults.  We spend so much time judging a book by it's cover, we never take the time to unlock the power inside it!  Just because something is different, it doesn't mean that it is bad.  Don't knock the unknown, because while it can be dark, more often than not, you will find a one of kind treasure in something or someone.  It's also important that we take care of our children.  They are our future, and I definitely want mine to be bright!   Cyberbullying is a growing trend that could be potentially dangerous and heartbreaking for the victim.  For more information about cyberbullying, go to stopcyberbullying.org